Omer 2025 Day 41

Day 40 | Day 42

Day 41: After Abel and Other Stories by Michal Lemberger
Yesod in Yesod, Connection in Foundation

The Torah is the foundational text of the Jewish people. Yet, there are points in the Torah that leave us wanting more, and that is where midrash comes in. There are many different definitions of midrash. During my fellowship at Milton Gottesman Jewish Day School in 2014 (then JPDS), a Judaics teacher I was working with explained midrash to her 5th grade class as "oral Torah" and encouraged them to treat midrash with the same weight they give to the Torah itself. More often, however, I hear midrash defined as "rabbinic stories." Either way, midrash is meant to provide more context to the Torah. For example, after Cain and Abel's sacrifices to God, "Cain said to his brother Abel … and when they were in the field, Cain set upon his brother Abel and killed him" (Genesis 4:8). The ellipses in the text has spawned a whole host of midrash attempting to answer the question of what transpired. It is a way of giving voice to voiceless moments and often missing from the Torah are the voices of women. After Abel imagines as modern midrash the voices of some of the women on the periphery of the Tanakh. Lemberger gives color and motivation to women who are otherwise only briefly mentioned. What, for example, did Eve think and feel after Cain killed Abel? The story of Eve reflecting on life and death, marriage and motherhood, in the wake of her son's death is just one profound example of how Lemberger centers women's voices in our foundational texts.

Omer 2025 Day 35

Day 34 | Day 36

Day 35: Let There Be Light by Liana Finck
Malchut in Hod, Leadership in Glory/Humility

Finck reimagines Creation and the story of Genesis as a graphic novel with God as a woman struggling with love and doubt. It compels us to ask how our relationship with God might be different if we thought of God as a woman? If we thought of God as struggling with insecurities, just wanting to be understood? 

What I love about this particular interpretation of the Akeda (the story of the Binding of Isaac) pictured is the footnote where Finck suggests God's motivation for this sacrifice - the juxtaposition of creation and destruction. In her imagining, Finck has made Abraham an artist whose life's work has been about creating art, and the Akeda is imagined as a window into destruction. What would it mean to destroy something we spent a lifetime creating, something precious to us? This footnote casts God as a teacher, a leader, giving Abraham a lesson in creation and destruction that God learned the hard way with Noah and the Flood. How do we teach others the hard lessons we have learned, the lessons that have humbled us and made us commit to doing better?

Omer 2025 Day 32

Day 31 | Day 33

Day 32: The Red Tent by Anita Diamant
Netzach in Hod, Endurance in Glory/Humility

The glimpse of Dinah's life that we see in the Torah practically begs us to ask more about her life. What was it like to be Jacob's only daughter? What was her relationship with her brothers? What happened to her after Shechem? In answer to these questions, Anita Diamant gave us The Red Tent, a modern imagining of Dinah's life and legacy. Diamant gives this complicated character a voice, strength, and purpose. Her story doesn't end abruptly and violently, but plays out fully. Dinah endures in our imaginations beyond the text.

Days of Awe

My first Yamim Noraim - my first experience of the Days of Awe - were truly awe-inspiring. It was a new year and, for me, everything was new: the prayers, the community, the sacred time of reflection, the hunger. I was struck by the familiarity with which we address God, reverential, but still close. It was only years later that someone pointed out to me that all of our prayers for forgiveness are said in the plural. We have sinned. Remember us. It didn't draw my attention at first, because it felt natural. After all, we were all together praying. But not this year.

For most of us in the US, the pandemic has meant that we have spent the past six months keeping our distance from others, praying mostly alone. Most weeks, my husband and I watch our shul's new livestream of Shabbat services from our living room with our daughters, who alternate between watching and playing. We've done the same for the High Holidays, except for Yom Kippur morning. Our shul repeated the Yom Kippur day service to give as many people as possible the opportunity to attend a limited in-person service, and both were livestreamed for anyone to watch at home. I had planned to watch the later service in the afternoon while my children napped, but I found myself on Yom Kippur morning with an occupied toddler and a napping baby, and an hour to myself. I opened my borrowed machzor and davened alone - sometimes aloud, sometimes silently, sometimes in English, and sometimes in Hebrew. I paused to think; I read the commentaries in the margins; and as I recited prayers from "us" alone, I reflected on my lack of awe this year, the strangeness, and the distance from each other and from God.

Truthfully, I was not awed this year. I spent these Days of Awe alternatingly or simultaneously grieving, angry, and numb. There are too many reasons to enumerate. Just since Rosh Hashanah a long ten days ago:

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg died. A feminist icon, a fierce defender of our rights and our Constitution, an outspoken and intelligent woman.

Our country is on fire. Literally (both naturally and man made) and figuratively. We are engulfed in rage and choked by partisanship.

We surpassed 200,000 deaths from COVID-19. Each of those people is missed by someone. Wear a mask.

Breonna Taylor was denied justice. Her trial and the lack of closure for her family and the country is just the latest proof of systemic racism and inherent inequality for our citizens.

Senate Republicans are moving ahead (hypocritically) to install a conservative justice who will set back women's rights and women's health for decades, impacting not only myself, but my daughters well into their own far-off adulthood.

This president continues to undermine our institutions and degrade our moral decency.

Even though I recognized the danger to our souls in his gleeful rejection of civility (or "political correctness"), I have not been immune to it. I have matched anger with anger; I have judged others harshly; I have been cynical and arrogant. Worse, I have succumbed to moments of despair, convinced that none of it matters, that nothing will get better. There is no justice and there can be no justice as long as those in power subvert justice and act outside the bounds of fair play.

But then I read Isaiah.

"For I will not always contend,

I will not be angry forever:

Nay, I who make spirits flag,

also create the breath of life." Isaiah 57:16 

God will not be angry forever. I will not be angry forever.

"If you banish the yoke from your midst, the menacing hand, the evil speech, and you offer your compassion to the hungry and satisfy the famished creature - then shall your light shine in darkness." Isaiah 58:9-10

And not from the High Holiday liturgy, but always and increasingly relevant: 

"You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to desist from it." Pirkei Avot 2:21

Kol Nidre begins Yom Kippur not with apologies for the past year, but a request to forgive the sins and annul the vows we will commit in the coming year. Even as we ask forgiveness for past transgressions, we acknowledge that we will sin again. But maybe we will do a little bit better in the coming year. May we learn from our past mistakes, so that even as we sin anew in 5781, we grow a little better. And therein lies the hope.

I alone and we together must do better this year. We cannot desist from the hard work of rebuilding justice and civility. We must set aside our anger and get to work banishing evil and increasing compassion. Although the world is dark, we must be sources of light. Although the situation seems hopeless, we can provide hope. Although we know we will need forgiveness again next year, we begin the new year with our best intentions. We commit to be better, to do more, to draw closer to God, and to always remember that we are in this together.

Politics, Pain, and Prayer

I unfriended my uncle on Facebook yesterday. I'm sure that he believes it is because we disagree (to put mildly) on almost every political issue, but I have many family members and friends with whom I disagree politically and it has never come to that. This is not really the appropriate place to get into the reasons we aren't "friends" anymore, but I mention it because trying to express myself to my uncle, whose callous disregard for experiences and feelings that are not his own has often left me frustrated, finally helped me put into words the emotions that I have been struggling with since Tuesday night. Much of the feelings below are excerpted from the last Facebook conversation I will ever have with my uncle.

First, of course, I am disappointed that Hillary didn't win, though I am heartened by the fact that she won the popular vote and won my home state of Illinois and my current home, Virginia. I am confident that her vast experience in law and government would have served this country well.

Along with that disappointment is fear. Many, myself included, are now grappling with a President-Elect whose campaign was built on tearing us down. Donald said, among many other insults that: women are either sex objects or else we are pigs who are bleeding out of our "wherevers;" Mexicans are rapists and drug dealers; Muslims celebrated 9/11 and are all terrorists; the disabled are deserving of mockery; Jews control the "global power structure;" African Americans all live in crime-ridden poverty in the inner cities; and I could go on. I am afraid as a Jew and as a woman. I am afraid not just for myself, but for friends and strangers dealing with bigots, misogynists, and racists - on Twitter and in real life - who feel emboldened by Donald's brand of "political incorrectness," which is really just a way of saying that they can't be bothered to be kind to others. I am afraid for us and for future generations, to whom we have sent the message that civility and truth do not matter. Our presidents have always been deeply flawed men, but they are role models nonetheless, in whom we hope to find some kernel of decency for our children to emulate and aspire to. I fear for a nation of children who might emulate Donald's pride in ignorance and his dismissiveness if not outright hostility to his opponents. He belittles people with whom he disagrees rather than addressing their concerns. He has no regard for the truth, facts, or grammatically-correct sentence structure. He has a huge ego. Sadly, this has gotten him far in life, but I would personally like to achieve success in a better way and I would hope that we expect better of the next generation.

Since I will be stuck with him as our president for the next four years, I have to hope that my fears will prove to be unfounded. But it is on Donald to build the bridges that he burned with women, minorities, and so many other people who are hurt and afraid. Trust and respect must be earned and he has a long way to go before he has earned that from me.

I will leave you with the Prayer for Our Country from Siddur Sim Shalom, the prayer book of Conservative Judaism, which I think we need now more than ever:

Our God and God of our ancestors: We ask Your blessings for our country, for its government, for its leaders and advisors, and for all who exercise just and rightful authority. Teach them insights from Your Torah, that they may administer all affairs of state fairly, that peace and security, happiness and prosperity, justice and freedom may forever abide in our midst. 

Creator of all flesh, bless all the inhabitants of our country with Your spirit. May citizens of all races and creeds forge a common bond in true harmony to banish all hatred and bigotry and to safeguard the ideals and free institutions which are the pride and glory of our country. 

May this land under Your Providence be an influence for good throughout the world, uniting all people in peace and freedom and helping them to fulfill the vision of Your prophet: "Nation shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they experience war any more."

Omer 2016 Recap

Honorable Mention

How many women could I name from the Tanakh before this Omer? Not nearly 49, but I am pleased to report that in the end I had women to spare! Here are some that I just couldn't place in the Omer, but who are nonetheless fantastic and have very interesting stories:

• Keturah, Abraham's second wife after Sarah's death (Genesis 25). Rashi suggested that Keturah was another name for Hagar, but others disagreed.
• Timna, Esau's son's concubine (Genesis 36:12). Feminist Judaism makes a big deal about her, because she is singled out among Esau's son Eliphaz's wives as just his concubine, instead of a full wife like the others (WRJ Torah). Another midrash suggests that she wanted to convert to Judaism, but was denied.
• Elisheba, Aaron's wife (Exodus 6:23) was mentioned only once in passing, but as the wife of the high priest, her life must have been fascinating. She also endured the tragic loss of her sons, Nadab and Abihu.
• Moses' second wife, the Cushite woman was a source of discord between Moses and his siblings, particularly Miriam, who was very upset that he would marry an outsider.
• Peninnah, Hannah's rival wife (1 Samuel 1) taunted Hannah for being barren.
• Solomon's 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:1-5). We think of Solomon as a wise and great king, but these 700 wives and 300 concubines managed to lead him astray and in his old age he worshiped their gods.
• The concubine from Bethlehem (Judges 19) quite possibly has the saddest story that I read in the Tanakh. She was taken as a concubine by a Levite man, but she ran away from him back to her father's house. He then went after her and took her back from her father. He showed no regard for her on their journey back to his home and when his life was threatened by an angry mob, he threw her out into the street, where the mob raped her to death.

In preparing for the Omer this year, I didn't get through the entire Tanakh (I read up to 2 Kings), so I'm sure that there are even more women who would have made great additions to the blog this year.

Recap

Below is a list of all the women of the Omer this year. I have put a * next to the ones I am most proud of.

Day 1: Naomi*
Day 2: Shifra and Puah*
Day 3: Rachel
Day 4: Hagar
Day 5: Sarah
Day 6: Rebecca
Day 7: Abigail
Day 8: Michal
Day 9: Potiphar's wife*
Day 10: Jezebel
Day 11: Yael*
Day 12: Lot's wife
Day 13: Yocheved
Day 14: Zipporah
Day 15: The women with the baby
Day 16: Hannah
Day 17: Abishag*
Day 18: Samson's first wife
Day 19: Manoah's wife
Day 20: Zilpah and Bilhah
Day 21: Vashti
Day 22: Rahab
Day 23: Leah
Day 24: Sisera's mother*
Day 25: The woman who killed Abimelech
Day 26: Miriam*
Day 27: Tamar, Judah's daughter-in-law
Day 28: The clever woman of Abel of Beth-maacah
Day 29: The widow who fed Elijah
Day 30: Zelophehad's daughters
Day 31: Deborah, Rebecca's nurse*
Day 32: Jephthah's daughter
Day 33: The clever woman of Tekoa
Day 34: Asenath
Day 35: Bathsheba
Day 36: Orpah
Day 37: Delilah
Day 38: Esau's wives
Day 39: Lot's daughters
Day 40: Eve
Day 41: The sorceress in En-dor
Day 42: Naamah
Day 43: Huldah the Prophetess
Day 44: Deborah
Day 45: Pharaoh's daughter
Day 46: Esther
Day 47: The Queen of Sheba
Day 48: Dinah and Tamar, King David's daughter*
Day 49: Ruth*

Omer 2016 Day 49: Ruth

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 48

Day 49: Malchut in Malchut, Leadership in Leadership
We made it to the end of the Omer! Tonight is Shavuot, the holiday that celebrates our receiving the Torah at Sinai after the exodus from Egypt. But before we celebrate our physical and spiritual freedom with cheesecake and late-night learning, we have to reflect on the 49th day of the Omer, leadership in leadership.

At our Passover seders 49 days ago, we all sat around our tables and read from the haggadah, "In every generation, each person must see himself or herself as if he or she personally experienced the Exodus from Egypt." Over the past 49 days, we have counted the Omer as if we were on a personal journey from slavery to freedom. It is also said that every Jewish person who had ever or would ever exist was present at Sinai when God gave us the Torah. Much of Judaism is about the collective - praying together, studying together, eating, mourning, and celebrating together - but I am reminded today that it is also an intensely personal experience. Each Jew understands Judaism in his or her own way. Each Jew embodies the seven sephirot of the Omer differently. Each of us comes with our own lens on the world which causes us to interpret the Omer differently. Even from year to year, my perspectives on the days of the Omer have changed as my experiences have changed.

Leaders must be able to balance the personal and the communal, their personal goals with the welfare of the people they lead. As the first convert, Ruth stands as the model on which conversions are based, a perfect example of leadership in leadership.

"Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you lodge, I will lodge; your people will be my people, and your God my God." (Ruth 1:16)

She is leadership in leadership, because her choice to convert shows an understanding and acceptance of this fundamental piece of Jewish life and leadership. She not only undertook a new personal identity and life, but also embraced the fact that doing so would make her part of the collective Jewish people.

Omer 2016 Day 48: Dinah and Tamar

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 47 | Skip to Day 49

Day 48: Yesod in Malchut, Connection in Leadership
There has been a lot in the news recently about the Stanford sexual assault case, which ended with a unanimous guilty verdict for the rapist and a disappointingly short six-month prison sentence, which will be only three months with good behavior. Since last weekend, the the moving letter written by the survivor has been widely shared on social media. You can and should read it in full here if you haven't already. It ends with this:

"And finally, to girls everywhere, I am with you. On nights when you feel alone, I am with you. When people doubt or dismiss you, I am with you. I fought everyday for you. So never stop fighting, I believe you." -Stanford survivor

Today, Vice President Joe Biden published an open letter supporting her and praising her strength and Texas Representative Ted Poe reiterated to the country that "no means no," because, for an unfathomable reason, that concept still eludes some people.

Of course, this got me thinking about Dinah and Tamar (King David's daughter, not the Tamar who was Judah's daughter-in-law), who both survived rape in the Tanakh. They are important female figures with painful stories, who I had been struggling to incorporate into the Omer this year until I read the Stanford survivor's letter.

Dinah was raped by Shechem, the son of the chief of the land (Genesis 34: 1-4). Tamar was raped by her half-brother, Amnon (2 Samuel 13:10-15). After both incidents, neither woman is heard from again. I can't help but wonder what they would have said if given the chance to speak out against their attackers and against the injustices they faced in their societies. I can't help but reflect in horror and anger on the persistence of this evil in the world. But we cannot despair, because as leaders we must be called to action. We must reach out to each other, build connections where there is isolation, and "never stop fighting" for a world free of rape and violence.

Omer 2016 Day 47: The Queen of Sheba

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 46 | Skip to Day 48

Day 47: Hod in Malchut, Glory in Leadership

"The queen of Sheba heard of Solomon's fame, through the name of the Lord, and she came to test him with hard questions." (1 Kings 10:1)

When Solomon passed her test and she saw his wealth and success with her own eyes, the queen of Sheba presented him with glorious gifts. There are so many lessons to learn from the queen of Sheba. We should not trust rumors about people, but see who they are for ourselves before making up our minds about them and we should prize and reward intelligence in leadership.

Omer 2016 Day 46: Esther

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 45 | Skip to Day 47

Day 46: Netzach in Malchut, Endurance in Leadership

"Mordecai had this message delivered to Esther: 'Do not imagine that you, of all the Jews, will escape with your life by being in the king's palace. On the contrary, if you keep silent in this crisis, relief and deliverance will come to the Jews from another quarter, while you and your father's house will perish. And who knows, perhaps you have attained to royal position for just such a crisis.'" (Esther 4:13-14)

Esther proves that leaders have a responsibility to use their positions of power to help others. As the queen, Esther was in a position to save the Jewish people from Haman's plot against them.

Omer 2016 Day 45: Pharaoh's daughter

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 44 | Skip to Day 46

Day 45: Tiferet in Malchut, Compassion in Leadership

"The daughter of Pharaoh came down to bathe in the Nile. She spied the basket among the reeds and sent her slave girl to fetch it. When she opened it, she saw that it was a child, a boy crying. She took pity on it and said, 'This must be a Hebrew child.'" (Exodus 2:5-6)

Knowing that her father had ordered his men to kill all the Hebrew boys, Pharaoh's daughter defied him to save baby Moses and raise him as her own.

Omer 2016 Day 44: Deborah

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 43 | Skip to Day 45

Day 44: Gevurah in Malchut, Justice in Leadership

"[Deborah] summoned Barak son of Abinoam, of Kedesh in Naphtali, and said to him, 'The Lord, the God of Israel, has commanded: 'Go, march up to Mount Tabor, and take with you ten thousand menof Naphtali and Zebulun. And I will draw Sisera, Jabin's army commander, with his chariots and his troops, toward you up to the Wadi Kishon; and I will deliver him into your hands.'"

But Barak said to her, 'If you will go with me, I will go; if not, I will not go.'

'Very well, I will go with you,' she answered. 'However, there will be no glory for you in the course you are taking, for the Lord will deliver Sisera into the hands of a woman.'" (Judges 4:6-9)

Who could better represent justice in leadership than Deborah, the judge and prophet who led the Israelites back to God after they had gone astray and worshiped idols?

As we know, Yael had the pleasure of defeating Sisera, just as Deborah prophesied.

Omer 2016 Day 43: Huldah the Prophetess

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 42 | Skip to Day 44

Day 43: Chesed in Malchut, Mercy in Leadership
King Josiah was made aware of a scroll that detailed instructions for how to act in the Temple, which generations of kings had disregarded, so he sent priests to seek the advice of Huldah the prophetess. Unfortunately, she did not have great news for them. Because they had ignored the teachings of this scroll and worshiped other gods, God planned to destroy them. However, Huldah continued with some merciful news for King Josiah:

"But say this to the king of Judah, who sent you to inquire of the Lord: Thus said the Lord, the God of Israel: As for the words which you have heard - because your heart was softened and you humbled yourself before the Lord when you heard what I decreed against this place and its inhabitants - that it will become a desolation and a curse - and because you rent your clothes and wept before Me, I for My part have listened - declares the Lord. Assuredly, I will gather you to your fathers and you will be laid in your tomb in peace. Your eyes shall not see all the disaster which I will bring upon this place." (2 Kings 22:18-20)

Huldah represents mercy in leadership, because, although she was tasked with relaying terrible news, she showed mercy and understanding to the king and was able to give him some measure of peace.

Omer 2016 Day 42: Naamah

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 41 | Skip to Day 43

Day 42: Malchut in Yesod, Leadership in Foundation

"Meanwhile, Rehoboam son of Solomon had become king in Judah. Rehoboam was forty-one years old when he became king, and he reigned seventeen years in Jerusalem - the city the Lord had chosen out of all the tribes of Israel to establish His name there. His mother's name was Naamah the Ammonitess." (1 Kings 14:21)

Naamah was one of King Solomon's many wives and the mother of Rehoboam, his successor to the throne. According to the Talmud, she was a righteous woman and the only mother of a sitting king who was a foreigner (she was an Ammonite).

Omer 2016 Day 41: The sorceress in En-dor

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 40 | Skip to Day 42

Day 41: Yesod in Yesod, Connection in Foundation

King Saul was the first king of Israel, anointed by the prophet Samuel. Eventually he fell out of favor with God and his throne was threatened by David. He wanted to seek advice from Samuel, but by that time, Samuel had died, so he went to a sorceress for help.

"They came to the woman by night and he said, 'Please divine for me by a ghost. Bring up for me the one I shall name to you.' But the woman answered him, 'You know what Saul has done, how he has banned [the use of] ghosts and familiar spirits in the land. So why are you laying a trap for me, to get me killed?'" (1 Samuel 28:8-9)

Saul assured her that she would not be punished and she did as she was asked, providing him a connection into the spirit world. Unfortunately for Saul, Samuel's ghost informed him that he and his sons and all the men with him would die the next day, but for our purposes, the point of this story is that the sorceress was able to connect Saul with Samuel, who had been there at the foundation of his installation as king and fittingly pronounced its end as well.

Omer 2016 Day 40: Eve

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 39 | Skip to Day 41

Day 40: Hod in Yesod, Glory/Humility in Foundation

"And God created man in His image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." (Genesis 1:27)

Eve is the foundation of humanity, created in the image of God (it doesn't get any more glorious than that) and it was through her curiosity that people gained the knowledge of good and evil.

Omer 2016 Day 39: Lot's daughters

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 38 | Skip to Day 40

Day 39: Netzach in Yesod, Endurance in Foundation

"Lot went up from Zoar and settled in the hill country with his two daughters, for he was afraid to dwell in Zoar; and he and his two daughters lived in a cave. And the older one said to the younger, 'Our father is old, and there is not a man on earth to consort with us in the way of all the world. Come, let us make our father drink wine, and let us lie with him, that we may maintain life through our father.'" (Genesis 19:30-32)

If your first reaction is "Ew!" then good, you don't believe in incest. The Torah doesn't either and, usually, it is punishable by death, which begs the question: Why are Lot's daughters rewarded with children for taking advantage of their father in this way?

The Jewish Women's Archive has a possible answer: "the Holy One, blessed be He, who knows man's thoughts, judges them by their thoughts and not their deed. The daughters' true intent was not to lie with their father, on whom they had no sexual designs, but to save the world from total devastation." Having just survived the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, losing their mother and married sisters in the process, and fearing that the whole world had been destroyed, Lot's daughters' primary goal was to survive into the next generation. Their children became the foundation of the Moabites and the Ammonites.

Omer 2016 Day 38: Esau's wives

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 37 | Skip to Day 39

Day 38: Tiferet in Yesod, Balance in Connection

"Esau realized that the Canaanite women displeased his father Isaac. So Esau went to Ishmael and took to wife, in addition to the wives he had, Mahalath the daughter of Ishmael son of Abraham, sister of Nebaioth." (Genesis 28:8-9)

The Torah made it pretty clear when Abraham was finding a wife for Isaac that marrying a local Canaanite woman simply would not do, so when Esau married Judith and Basemath the Hittites, it was no surprise that Isaac and Rebecca were unhappy about it (Genesis 26:34-35). In an attempt to appease his parents, Esau tried to balance his wives by adding a third, Mahalath, with whom he had a family connection.

Omer 2016 Day 37: Delilah

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 36 | Skip to Day 38

Day 37: Gevurah in Yesod, Power in Connection

"[Samson] fell in love with a woman in the Wadi Sorek, named Delilah. The lords of the Philistines went up to her and said, 'Coax him and find out what makes him so strong, and how we can overpower him, tie him up, and make him helpless; and we'll each give you eleven hundred shekels of silver." (Judges 16:4-5)

One would think that after being betrayed by his first wife, Samson would have learned a thing or two about trusting women who wanted to know damaging secrets about him, but apparently not. Delilah used her connection to Samson to take away his power, convincing him to confide in her. Like Potiphar's wife, Delilah abuses her power by using Samson's love for her against him.

Delilah teaches us to appreciate and safeguard the trust that others put in us and not to use their secrets for our own personal gain.

Omer 2016 Day 36: Orpah

What is the Omer? | Go back to Day 35 | Skip to Day 37

Day 36: Chesed in Yesod, Love/Kindness in Connection
If you remember from day 1, Naomi had two daughters-in-law, Orpah and Ruth. When Naomi's husband and two sons died, she offered Orpah and Ruth the opportunity to go home to their parents and remarry, rather than remaining with her when she had no more sons to marry them or way of providing for them. After some back and forth in which both Ruth and Orpah offered to go with Naomi and Naomi insisted they leave, it ended with this:

"They broke into weeping again, and Orpah kissed her mother-in-law farewell. But Ruth clung to her." (Ruth 1:14)

Orpah is often treated as a footnote in the story of Ruth, because she chose to go home and start her life over, instead of staying with Naomi, like Ruth did. Don't worry, we will get to Ruth at a later date. For now, Orpah is a fascinating example of love and kindness in connection. Maharat Ruth Balinsky Friedman notes that Orpah did nothing wrong by choosing to go home and suggests that Orpah's choice is the one that most of us would make in the same situation. She says, "We tend not to see ourselves as active and capable of making a difference in the world. Because of this, we often make the choices of Orpah and shy away from challenging our identities and roles."

We don't know what happened to Orpah after she left Naomi, but because of Naomi's kindness, she had the opportunity to (and we can assume or hope that she got to) go home and start a new life. I can only imagine that her new life was informed by the love she presumably had for her husband and that she clearly showed in her tearful goodbye to her mother-in-law. Orpah may not have chosen to adopt Judaism and leave her native land, like Ruth did, but those connections stay with us, even when we are apart.